VETTING

 

With divorce and cheating rates going through the roof marriage is a risky business. A popular idea among the more traditional / right wing / conservative sections of the manosphere is that you can reduce the odds of a marriage failing if you vet her carefully before hand.

At first glance this seems to make perfect sense. A woman who spent her 20s having loads of one night stands is more likely to cheat on you than a women who had a couple of long term relationships. A career woman who out earns you is far more likely to divorce you than a stay at home wife. A women with a bad childhood is far more likely to have "issues" than one from a good family background.

Unfortunately there are a number of problems with this that are overlooked.......

Women fall on a spectrum. Many men put women into 2 categories, "pump and dump" or "wife and mother". Whereas in reality there is a big grey area between good woman and bad woman. Some women give off massive red flags. Finding out she takes hard drugs, previously made a false rape allegation or stabbed her ex by the second date then yes, get the hell out of there. Most women don't and their true nature only comes through after many years.

It assumes that you have the options to vet women in the first place. If you tick all the boxes, tall, confident good looking, successful and have dozens of potential suitors who would be happy to marry you and have your babies. Then you can afford to be picky. Unfortunately only the top few percent of men fall into this category.

You become the male version of the woman hunting for Mr. 6 Feet tall, 6 pack abs, 6 figure income. What are the odds of meeting a woman in the modern era, in a western country, who has a low body count, isn't hooked on her smart phone, isn't tainted by feminism, wants a traditional marriage and meets your minimum requirement for attractiveness ?

"Good women" will be in high demand. Just as men instinctively know that high body count women are bad bets for paternity. The reverse is also true, good luck with competing against dozens of men for the few "good girls."

If you met this mythical 23 year old virgin in the modern western world it begs an obvious question....why ? It could well be that she's a virgin because she's never felt much compulsion to have sex. Marrying a former slut is a terrible idea but the other side of the coin is marrying a loyal but sexually repressed, low libido woman. Hardly marital bliss !!!

If you "locked down" a young woman in marriage she is going to be exposed to the idea she is wasting her younger years.  Slutty friends and the media will often convince her to "catch up". 

You can't estimate a woman's body count so don't even try. Living in a small town in the pre internet era, a woman's "count" would have been common knowledge. Today she can play the "good girl" in the pub at weekends while discretely having sex with countless random men via dating apps midweek. There are some obvious signs, but not all women display them.

Going to church means nothing. A lot of former sluts turn to religion in middle age. It's the perfect combination of an environment that forgives their past behaviour and is full of clueless blue pill beta males. 

Some men promote, bang loads of women until you are 35, then marry a virgin. Go figure !!!!

Realistically you are never going to reduce the odds of divorce or cheating to acceptable levels. If you could theoretically half the odds you have done well. But that still a 25% chance, do you honestly want to gamble your freedom, sanity and finances on those odds. You simply cannot undo the effects of modern life such as social media. Unless you do something drastic like live in a third world village miles away from western influence.  

It assumes that divorce and cheating are the only ways a marriage can fail. She can cut off the sex, get fat, turn into horrible insufferable cow and generally make your life hell without cheating on you.

If it worked there would be a lot of men on the internet, who have been happily married for decades telling other men to do the same. Spoiler there isn't 

"Vetting" is a deeply flawed idea

The answer is not to the liking of the traditional / right wing / conservative crowd. Traditional marriage in the 21st century doesn't work anymore. At best you are shaving a few percentage points off the odds of having your life destroyed. Trying to marry a low body count woman isn't a good idea, it's a slightly less bad one. Here are some alternatives

Women You Should NOT Have Sex With - Alpha Male 2.0 (alphamale20.com)
Don't "Screen" Women. Instead, Categorize - Alpha Male 2.0 (alphamale20.com)